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you know me NOT.

KAREN to mostly everyone, KAYE to my relatives and family friends, KALAYKS/KALAYKAY to my dad.

19. Full of dreams. Suffers from verbal and mental diarrhea. Loves the idea of visiting Rome and Greece.

Dagupan City, Pangasinan native but embarrassingly knows only a few Panggalatok words.

Developed her LOVE for the SUN when she was BORN.
away from here.

KIKAY KALAYKAY photo albums. my friendster account. my previous blog. Perez Hilton. Go Fug Yourself Seventeen Magazine One.org Ala Paredes Bianca Gonzales
history.

November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008

kudos.

layout designer and image: eloquent
Twitter Updates
date: Thursday, June 26, 2008
title: behind the scars.
time: 10:14 PM

it was several months ago. i was blog-hopping and i came to read this wonderful, really touching story:

once upon a time, there was this big piece of rock living peacefully on a mountaintop. one day, he gets transported somewhere far, far away. all of a sudden, he receives multiple blows around his body. he gets hurt once, twice, more times. he’s hurt bad. he doesn’t know why he’s being beaten, but it goes on and on. one day, it suddenly all stops. everything becomes peaceful just like it was before. after some time, he notices that people start to look at him, they stop and stare, and he’s wondering why. one day, there were two workers walking by, and they were carrying a big mirror. the rock saw his reflection, and saw, he was now a beautiful statue.

since then, i couldn't help but remember it every time i feel super upset. nung bata pa ako, mahilig akong maglaro sa labas at tumakbo. sa sobrang likot ko, hindi na bago sa akin yung madapa, magalusan. but whenever i do, i always cry. kasi masakit at mahapdi. also, i was afraid of the isopropyl alcohol that mama used to clean the wound. she used to say, "pag hindi natin yan nilagyan ng alcohol, hindi gagaling yan." i'd shut my eyes tight until she finished patting the wet cotton on my skin. i'd cry even more because it stung. then mama would blow my wound to lessen the pain. until now, marami pa rin akong peklat sa legs. dati, i used to be insecure about it. but now, kumapal na ng konti, kahit papaano, yung mukha ko at nagsho-shorts na ako minsan pag naglalakwatsa.

i came to realize that scars are nothing to be ashamed of because they define who we are and what we've been through. it serves as a visible and permanent proof of how we were able to endure and survive pain. gaya nung mga sugat ko sa tuhod. tanda yun ng pagkakaroon ko ng napakasayang childhood. i don't need to find old pictures to help myself remember how i was as a kid. tingin na lang sa tuhod, sabay sabi ng "aaah. eto yung consequence ng katangahan ko dati." haha.
be proud! scarred people are beautiful.

it's also like when we face difficult, complicated problems. we get beat up with stress. we cry a river. we almost want to pull our hair off because we could no longer take the pressure. but, like the stone, we have to be patient because in time, we'd be stronger, more beautiful and more prepared for future blows from that thing we call 'life'. also, people would learn to admire us because of it.

on my part naman, naghahanap ako ng karamay. haha. pag hindi ako nag-aral para sa isang quiz, maghahanap ako ng hindi rin nag-aral. ang kapupulutan na aral doon ay MAY KASAMA KA, KAIBIGAN. (sharon cuneta?) haha. seriously though, you are not alone. yun na lang isipin natin. kasi kung feeling mo na wala ng pag-asa, andyan pa si GOD. and sigurado ako na may ISANG TAO na patuloy na magmamalasakit sa'yo at hindi ka huhusgahan.

naku, tama na nga! is this for real?? haha. i hope we all learned a valuable lesson from the STONE.

GOD BLESS!